How Are You Going to Celebrate National Potato Chip Day?

Tomorrow is National Potato Chip Day here in the United States of America.

Or maybe we should call it

National Flatulence Day, or maybe

National Inflammation Day, or how-bout

National Disrespect Yourself Day, or even

National Embrace How Shitty You Feel Day.

Not only do Americans eat this junk food all year long in the vein of, oh, 1.2 billion pounds, but they feel they need to celebrate the gluttony too. I wonder if this somehow lightens the guilt of eating 5 servings (55 chips) in one sitting, or like many, the entire bag.

There are a lot of awesome people in this country doing lots of awesome things (like this guy for example), but there are also a lot of morons and a prevailing moronic attitude. The BM Chips website offers up some of the lameness on a silver platter:

“Is there a specific food associated with this holiday?
Yes.  The holiday is “National Potato Chip Day”, so the food you would eat is potato chips.”

“Is this month connected with a specific geographical area?
Yes, the term “National” means the United States, however, chips are available in other countries.”

So, what are you going to do tomorrow when you send your little ones off to school? Are you going to take this “holiday” as your free ticket to cheat? Maybe you’ll make some homemade chips with butter or lard and follow along with one foot just outside the beaten path.

Or are you going to stand up for what you believe in and boycott it for the idiotic and destructive occasion that it is?

National Potato Chip Day isn’t a joke to me. I mean it was when I first heard it. But when I think about it, it’s a symbol of how patheticly misguided this country is. If I give in and let Evelyn “play along” just because she’s a kid, I’m sending a message that she will no doubt remember into adulthood that it’s ok to forsake her beliefs in the name of fitting in. But fit in is the last thing I want my kid to do right now.